how to be alone

I am in love with this video:

5 trips i want to take RIGHT NOW

Driving the California coast from San Diego to Eureka:

Ireland Roadtrip:

Iceland:

Savannah and Charleston:

Banff and Glacier National Parks:

heartache? here? on this blog?

Before you have a baby, everyone tells you it will be the best thing that ever happens to you, which is true. You don't believe it until you experience it, but watching your baby become a little person is the most incredible feeling. However, there is one feeling that parents don't seem to mention: fear.

This past week I've struggled with a paralyzing fear that was initiated by this heartbreaking story. I did not know this family and never had the pleasure to meet their beautiful baby girl. But she reminds me of Harper in so many ways. I have never been so affected by the death of someone I had never met. I found myself crying daily, every time I would think about it. If you are feeling kind, consider making a donation to Children's Medical Center, here, in the name of Margot Miller.

mommyhood and happiness

So yesterday I found myself at a tot's birthday party in the company of several SAH moms. It's strange, but I think you become part of an exclusive, mommyhood sorority when you have kids, especially when you decide to work from home or become a full-time mum. I never thought I would be the kind of mom who would converse about playdates, mom-and-baby activities, and preschool and get EXCITED about it. But there I was, in a friend's kitchen, holding a beer, and watching gazillions of toddlers and kids run around me like little bees. The Husband stood next to me, holding Harper, and we were all engrossed in parenthood fodder. I was so happy. I was so giddy about being a mom that I came home and joined the local early childhood PTA.

Once we got Harp home and asleep in bed, we watched A Single Man, one of the most visually stunning films I've seen EV-ER. If you know me well, you know I am a tad obsessed with the 1960s, and this director got it SO RIGHT. Granted, I've never been to the 60s, but I know it was right on the money. I could FEEL it. Anyway, the storyline was good too, but I was more embedded within the visuals and lovliness of this film. While the ending was somewhat sad, I went to bed feeling happy and alive. And Colin Firth was fantastic. Simply fantastic. See it.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes

My blog has a new look, and my life has undergone some ch-ch-ch-ch-changes (thank you, David Bowie). In the last month I have 1) quit my job, 2) started freelancing again full time, and 3) realized how much I've missed writing. Teaching a literature/writing class is a big commitment, and while I miss my students and the adventure that teaching can bring, I am excited to explore some things that I could not do with a full-time job. My daughter is growing by leaps and bounds, and I've realized (now that she's older) that one of the things I most look forward to as she grows is introducing her to the things that I love so much. I can't wait to take her to Europe. I can't wait t0 visit the library with her like my mom did for us every summer to check out books (WHY do library books smell so good??). I can't wait to read her The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, Alice in Wonderland, Harry Potter, and all those fantastical books that made me long to begin my own personal adventures. I can't wait to shop for back-to-school supplies. I can't wait to take her to a museum and tell her how special every exhibit is. I can't wait to experience childhood all over again now that I'm an adult.

Well, that's all for now. More to come soon.

fixing a hole

When I was about 2, I discovered the Beatles. No, seriously. I must have been a wee tot because my first memory is of my mother singing me a Beatles lullaby. To this day I can't hear "All My Loving" without getting sleepy and sentimental. I've been a Beatles fan ever since, and readers of this blog can attest to this fact. I listened to them obsessively throughout my entire adolescence, and I visited almost every major Beatles site of significance in England. I'm telling you all of this so you will understand my excitement over the newly remastered Beatles records. I was skeptical at first--that is, until I listened to the remastered version of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. I heard things in the instrumentation that I didn't know was there; it was kind of like hearing it for the first time. And for a Beatles fan like me, that's a big deal. I especially found a new love and fondness for "Fixing a Hole," a song I didn't pay much attention to before. Now I can't stop singing it... "Fixing a hole, where the rain gets in..."

my kind of store

While shopping for my little one, one store just makes my heart flutter. Janie and Jack is like the Anthropologie for babies and tots, and I can't get enough of it. I shop their sale rack because, well, I just don't see the point in paying full price for something that will be outgrown in a matter of months. But please don't hold that against me. I have found some fantastic items on clearance, like this minty green dress embellished with trees and tiny deer. Besides the super cute and fashionable outfits in stock, Janie and Jack also has less pink frocks than the average baby store. And anyone who knows me knows that I am a firm believer in baby girls wearing more than just powder pink onesies. I mean, really, would you want to wear pink outfits with little butterflies on them everyday? So thanks, Janie and Jack, for giving mums like me a better place to shop.